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Diagnosis (Deluxe Edition)

by Iron Krill

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1.
It’s the day everything turned meaningless Eternity may pass before I can clear my head Eternity may pass before I resist this fog The air is heavy, the light is blackening, nothing to do but just rot away What is this voice I hear? When will you show your face? It’s like you’re the moon that haunts me I wish for only a clear sky The fog clears and I see your form, the final image in head. All hell breaks loose as your figure burns into my skull for the last time, the final image in my head. When will I ever know Why you’ve forsaken me? It’s like you’re the moon that haunts me I wish for only a clear sky You are the ghost I feared.
2.
Divisions 04:36
We walk our parallel paths with no glimmer in our eyes, for the passion deep inside us drains all to emptiness. No way to change, no way to end. An estimated love falls too short It doesn’t have to hurt I’m not too sure What lies between us Caught in a system neither of us could ever control. We burn to ash every time we try. This portrait of a perfect life has fallen again and again. An estimated love falls too short It doesn’t have to hurt I’m not too sure What lies between us I will never give in Under an iron wall I’m not too sure What lies between us I’m not eternal I won’t waste this chance
3.
The pumpkins sing but the geese die Nothing else to sing about but stupid munchkins Open wide, kids! I’m gonna GRAPE you in the mouth! You know, the thing about tying them to the radiator is... it doesn't really make the process any easier, it just makes it look more impressive, so... it's still a good thing to do. The pumpkins sing but the geese die The pumpkins sing but the geese die People are always asking me, "what's the hardest part about being a cone?" and I say, "eating, of course... it's like trying to floss a cat. All right, I got another question for you guys. Why do mermaids wear sea shell bras? Because they can’t fit into D shells. How do you end up at UW when you’re trying to get from Kirkland to Redmond? It just doesn’t make any sense. The pumpkins sing but the geese die The pumpkins sing but the geese die
4.
At the Last 04:01
Slaves to consistency, I don’t want to see your faces, only the fallen hopes. Now they walk the paths of darkness. It’s not night, they just won’t let the sun invade their hollow spectrum, filled with thoughts of how to end the walk that they run every day. Nothing else to do with life now that humanity has turned on itself. Now they take upon the burden of becoming yet another. Though they say that they’re so human, they don’t take the form as common people. Do we kill every one, or do they have something that we lack in honesty? At the last we will be repaid.
5.
It’s been two years now Since you’ve talked to me Each moment’s longer than the last This deafening silence screams to be resolved The tension threshold is surpassed Not the way things had to be Unassuming gall Hope for reciprocity I take my face off I won’t say anything at all Your voice is music, let it all out I’ve never felt so far away from you But here I am and there you are I saw you in the crowd, you looked at me And I knew then we had to talk Your face burns into my eyes Your lips part to speak A lump catches in your mouth As you start to weep I won’t say anything at all Your voice is music, let it all out I just want to let you talk I won’t say anything at all And I won’t say anything And I won’t say anything And I won’t say anything And I won’t say, I won’t say, I won’t say anything
6.
A spark inside each darkened mind A hope that reigns through every night A spark, a hope Every time we’re lost Every time we can’t get up You ignite the idle soul You alone can bring us home Just like the failures of our past This song will never hope to do justice to your name But I can’t stop singing your praises, Lord You’ve become a part of who I am Every moment drifting from the truth You brought me back to light Every time I just fell short You were there to pull me through You have always been An endless reservoir of love to me You will always be my Lord This will never change A gift of mercy Weakly answered by our feeble praise I will follow you Every day In every way My God
7.
Memories 04:11
Remember the night when everything was perfect, our thoughts were as one. Remember the night when time stopped before us and all we knew is you and me are in this room, and all I can see is your gorgeous face. Well lately I’ve been trapped into a corner of the mind where frankly I can’t see any thoughts but those you’re putting in my head. And let’s be honest, the things you say aren’t always met with honesty. And as I continue on my search for truth in what you’ve said to me, I see a spark of hope flash forward, for I know you once loved, your heart once shone bright as the sun. But the spark is gone. I don’t know what’s happened to us. Please restore me to some sense of love. You put these chains here on my heart. I never knew they could pull so hard. You held my heart so faithfully, so perfectly, but now I don’t know what’s happened to us. Please restore me to some sense of love. Restore me to some sense of hope. I’m losing you and yet I can’t imagine a life led without you. Please take this from me, the silence that rips me wide open. I know we can never be together in a perfect life but I thought that we could at least try. It’s like I never meant a thing to but a vacant love in an empty dream but I can tell you for a fact that I meant every word and I can’t believe that you and me will leave this room no more to each other than memories.
8.
Sometimes you’re just stuck in the past In the memories here to last Living with ghosts, you become one Not a thing matters anymore Live in the present It’s the only thing worth trying for Live in the present It’s the only thing worth dying for Some turn to the future To dreams and possibilities But when reality strikes And something crumbles, there’s nothing left Live in the present It’s the only thing worth trying for Live in the present It’s the only thing worth dying for The best days in the world Are the ones lived for themselves Without memory or forward view Just choose what you want to do Live in the present It’s the only thing worth trying for Live in the present It’s the only thing worth dying for
9.
Diagnosis 02:35
And so you’ve realized that your struggle Brought no fruit to the table Once you’ve wasted all you have On selfishness’ greed What do you really want? What is it you really seek? I know the glimmer in your eye It craves a dying passion I see the sorrow in your dying heart Underneath the frantic skin Crying out to stop the waste you live As it is, we all can see Throughout all your lively days Never once did you try to fight for Anything greater than yourself You need to back up, Look back at your life As it is, you do not Realize what truly drives you Back up, look again
10.
Untold 03:45
There exists beneath the surface Another scene, the underground Here we are: the force that fights forwards Go ahead, think about how important yours is Go to bed, wake again, go to bed, dream of life Life is yours, in your hands Yet you choose the easy path You can always do this But you’ll never feel the same as us We are the story that is untold But a spirit that engulfs us all Must our cries remain unheard? We are but four among millions crying, Hear my words So don’t get up, out of bed Till you see there’s more to this Don’t complain, scream aloud Till you’ve made your path, an honest choice
11.
I still feel your eyes burning holes through me every time I take a step into your life to get to your inside, to get beyond the blank and empty stare. Don’t make me look below, let me look inside. Throw away the pride, throw away the thought of leading your whole entire life one hundred percent fully pure and follow my eyes down into the vast unknown. I’ve lived too long to think these thoughts are my own evil, selfish will. I’ve lived too long to think your thoughts wouldn’t turn to action if they could. Come back... feel, it’s just you and me. Come on back with me, feel again what you’re worth. I know I’ll never be a perfect answer and the key to your heart is still out of sight but I don’t care. I swear I don’t care. I’ll just do what it takes to make it so we can feel something. All I really know is I just want to feel anything. Out just one window of our lives, it’d be nice to see the sun shine through and the pressure leave. Out of the ashes of our past, it’d sure be nice to see a blossom shine. Feel again. You’re worth more than you know. Love is gone so let’s do whatever it takes. I’ll just do what it takes to make it so we can feel something. All I really know is I just want to feel anything.
12.
So much pressure to satisfy the needs of the mind, the body’s burden. My soul’s been trampled too long. So much apathy towards the loving spirit in my heart. Have I already forgotten the joy of loving, the hope of breathing life, the reason we fight our own wars? I’ll never be content this way, I’ll never fill the gap, I’ll never reach the end of my search for bliss, the endless bliss I seek. Have I already forgotten the joy of loving, the hope of breathing life, the reason we fight our own wars? I must treasure the love that still lives in me and fight to love again. I will fight to love again.
13.
We rode the rivers of the eastern trail Deep in the land of the Rus Following the wind in our sails And the rhythm of the oars No shelter in this hostile land Constantly on guard Ready to fight and defend Our ship to the bitter end We came under attack I received a deadly wound A spear was forced into my back Still I fought on When I am dead Lay me in a mound Raise a stone for all to see Runes carved to my memory Here I lay on the riverbank A long, long way from home Life is pouring out of me Soon I will be gone I tilt my head to the side And think of those back home I see the river rushing by Like blood runs from my wounds Here I lay on wet sand I will not make it home I clench my sword in my hand Say farewell to those I love When I am dead Lay me in a mound Raise a stone for all to see Runes carved to my memory
14.
Jingle Bells 01:02
15.
Frozen 04:03
These days I can't find the strength to start again I've torn apart my wretched past but the life now revived refuses to live Broken beyond repair How can I ignore what I have done? How can I regain my self-respect? I fear I never will One day I'll be free From my past, my lust, my pride All I know is I can never do this on my own Now I feel soft lips kissing off the tears from my cheeks Now I glimpse warm hands uncovering the grip on my eyes, now clenched shut and frozen in fear
16.
Reality no longer battles perception This letter's written to no one Sincere, I sought your truth and divine purpose Through myths of revelation Guidance all wrapped up in a paper box Supported only so long as my mind was the enemy I could not in conscience hold on As we face distress We must not lose heart Stand fast and press on Triumph awaits As we face distress We must not lose heart Stand fast and press on Triumph awaits us The powerful constant that I had once leaned on Is no longer there You call this shameful disbelief A process like losing my closest friend As we face distress We must not lose heart Stand fast and press on Triumph awaits As we face distress We must not lose heart Stand fast and press on Triumph awaits us Sometimes we have to watch our whole lives fall apart Before we can rebuild them again A greater foundation I wish there was another way But no amount of devotion can fix this Triumph awaits Sometimes we have to watch our whole lives fall apart Before we can rebuild them again A greater foundation

about

Tracks 1-12: Diagnosis (standard edition)
Tracks 13-16: Bonus Tracks

credits

released November 11, 2011

DIAGNOSIS (Tracks 1-12)

Charlie Garcia – Guitar, lead vocals
Colin Tremblay – Bass, vocals
JD Laurence-Chasen – Drums, vocals

All music and lyrics written by Charlie Garcia except:
“A Moment’s Regret” - Scott Lindstrom
“Live in the Present” - Colin Tremblay

Recorded With:

Schecter Hellraiser C-1 guitar
Ibanez RG3EXFM1 guitar
Ibanez GSR100EX bass
Shure KSM27 microphone
Yamaha PSRE313 keyboard
Behringer Xenyx 1202FX mixer
Sony ACID Music Studio 7.0 recording software
Line 6 POD XT guitar effects processor
Toontrack Superior Drummer 2.0 (drum software)

Produced and mixed by Charlie Garcia

Featuring:
- Megan Hopper on tracks 1 and 11
- Elika Berlin on tracks 5 and 12

Special thanks to:
- Scott Lindstrom for original version of “A Moment’s Regret”
- Mæstad Kjartan and the Institute of Marine Research for the album cover photograph
- As I Lay Dying, Underoath, and Jacob Brown
Random:
- Jolynda Hopper appears briefly during “Memories”
- Some random people show up in “Untold”
- Lyrics for Singing Pumpkins and Dying Geese inspired by Katie Borden, Hannah Moe, and Peter Freeman

Tracks 13-16 are bonus tracks recorded after the album was published, initially distributed only at live shows, now available together with the rest of the songs on bandcamp.

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Iron Krill Seattle, Washington

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